Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Sarah Jessica Parker Makes Me Get Philosophical.

I stayed home from work today due to excessive rage. I wasn't sick, but I was seriously going to kill someone. Most people know me as extremely laid-back and extremely patient, but there are a lot of things going on right now in every aspect of my life that one more thing was going to send me over the edge.

The fact that I live in the same building as my mother makes me turn from "slightly annoyed at several events" to "i'm going to get into the car, slam on the pedal, and recklessly drive until i can't feel feelings anymore", which is a dangerous mental state.

Long story short, I spent the day mostly at home (minus going to fill out auto refinance paperwork, taking the dog to the groomer's and collecting my mother from the state capital, during rush hour, while she bitched that I was 20 minutes late.) I tried to have a relax day, and my boss had lent me Sex and the City 2 a couple days ago.

In the first half of the movie, the women are fabulous, they look great (for their ages...) and everyone is out getting theirs and traveling to exotic locales. Right in the middle, my best friend from college calls and I pause the movie. She lives in Manhattan and I will be visiting her next weekend. She's a single girl, works in PR, and lives the successful, Samantha Jones-type existence. She asks what I want to do and inspired by that quartet of cougars, I respond, "I want to go somewhere I can wear hooker/club shoes but not anywhere that would make my husband uncomfortable."

Then I watched the second half of that movie, when sh*t goes to hell, and that inflated "Let's party!" mood dissipated. And I realize that none of that stuff would actually make me happy. As much as I consider myself totally boring now, being all married-y, I would never trade anything I have with my husband for all the clothes, travel, hair stylists, or nightlife there is. I don't even want him to think that I would want that life over what we have together. I truly, truly love him. He's funny and passionate, honest, impulsive, strong, capable, and sexy as hell. Compared to being with him, those other things just aren't appealing like they used to be.

So do married people still go out? Like, really go out? I don't want to go to a rave, but I'm not talking about an Applebee's.

Is it ok to go out when my husband's deployed?


  1. I don't really feel comfortable going out when hubby's gone just because it makes me sad that he can't be there too. I'm not really much of a partier anyway though so it's not like I miss it. Since he left about 4 months ago, I have gone out one time but my mom was there so I'm thinking it didn't really count. :]

  2. You're going to laugh... but I stayed home today too. And watched Sex and the City 2. LOL. Seriously.

    When hubby is out of town and I don't want to be alone, I go out to dinner with friends. It's not club hopping, but it feels good to be 'out' with people rather than sitting at home. It sounds like you and J have a great relationship, and it's good for you to have things that socially satisfy you without him.

    Now, about living in the same building with your mother? How does that work? I'd be having some rage-y moments as well!

  3. Moms have a way of making us all crazy! They know ALL the wrong things to say!! GRRR!

  4. Girl,

    It is OK to go out while Mr. is gone. Your life doesn't stop. When you go out it doesn't mean you love and miss him any less. Go out, have a good time. It isn't like you are going out every weekend and getting sloshed. Going out with friends that you don't see all the time is part of life, sister. So, get out, with your hooker shoes and all.

    Married couples do go out, I don't think it is just limited to commercialized "fine" dining places like, Applebee' both have to make the effort, which I am sure you do.

    Remember, going out doesn't mean getting hammered and ending up in a verbal fight with Canadian bachelors. Not anymore, anyway. ; )

    have fun!

  5. I think it's okay to go out when your husband is deployed--for your own sanity. But for your safety, choose a sensible pair of hooker shoes.

  6. I think if you're comfortable going out, then go out. I went out once or twice when the hubs was deployed. It was nice to just get out of the house, have a few drinks, listen to a great band. Any guy that tried talking me up though got the ring waved in his face :)

  7. Well ladies, you have spoken.

    I am breaking out the damn heels.